8th Avenue South: On Paul Ryan and Launching

Paul Ryan said that college grads shouldn't have to live out their twenties in their childhood bedrooms. Paul Ryan is very good with language. I agree with him that college grads shouldn't have to be living at home but that doesn't mean they should move out either. I'm glad that the way he phrases his comment permits a choice. And I do understand that his rhetoric was directed at an economy that might give college grads a choice about choosing between launching and living on the street or out of the backseat of your car or staying home and having fresh socks and steady meals.? My complaint is that he employed a concept conceived in the sixties and is tainted with traces of the rebelliousness that initiated the decline in the traditional Americn family.? After all, as?the Vice Presidential choice of the Republicans, wouldn't you think that he would be talking about the family as the most important economic unit in a nation no matter what configuration that family unit has?

I think this whole idea of having to launch and specifying an ideal?particular age range to do so is more a product of the worldview of Baby Boomers from the rebellious sixties who rejected the values of the traditional home than one that can be applied historically and culturally as universal. That Ryan conceded to the construct might imply that his values too have been swayed by the influence of the relativity of American popular culture. For example, Asian, Mediterranean, and indigenous peoples consider the idea of launching itself as a kind of prefabrication of exported Americana. In fact, Ryan might be using the same rationale or argument that the sixties boomers used to leave home and commune with one another. At least he is appealing to the argument because the whole concept of having to launch is a non-traditional American value.

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Putting that aside however, and speaking in terms of postmodern America, the authors of Not Quite Adults (2010) suggest the trend to launch later may actually be a good thing (Sue Shellenbarger, The Benefits of a Late Launch, WSJ Blog). I think its a mutual decision on when an adult child should leave the building. The expectant launching age depends on a number of factors. Also, the expectant launching age varies depending on country and culture. Countries and cultures that respect the elderly, also have a higher regard for youth, that is, where you find people caring for the elderly, you will find them caring for youth. Caring for might not be the right word. Attending to might be a better verb which connotes not only caring for but also showing an interest in.

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Arianna Huffington made a good point in her video series Becoming Fearless about aging: "In a culture that values youth as much as ours does, time is public enemy number one. Every new wrinkle or gray hair can send fear shooting through us. I'm lucky enough to have come from Greece, a country that honors and reveres old age" (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/08/28/arianna-on-aging_n_1834072.html). I believe what she means here is that we value the appearance of youth not necessarily the spirit of youth.

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I feel that in America today, we value neither youth nor the elderly. If?it is deemed socially acceptable?to jettison our kids prematurely then why not ?help Mom and Pop arrive a little early to the afterlife. We have allowed schools, social service agencies, and law enforcement to usurp parental responsibility as we have relied on government, retirement communities, and nursing homes to assume our responsibilities as children to our parents. This had made us callous to both their needs. We have been dehumanized by a media that glorifies a youthful popular culture and by a culture of dependency and victimization that signals our youth that they are entitled to self-esteem and happiness without having to earn it. Unfortunately, it signals to parents as well that they are now liberated from having to teach their children the lessons of hard work. Just as adults today feel they should have it all and have it now; children are now entitled to all the cookies in the cookie jar and it just doesn't matter if it spoils their dinner because no one sits down to eat together anyway. This dehumanization is characterized by a bifurcation between the generations. We are not only being cut off from one another based on race as I have noted in previous posts in regard to Black youth and their perception of whiteness, but also based on age.

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It was only two or three generations ago that women did not leave their parents' home until they were married and it was only two or three generations ago that men, particularly men raised in rural areas, lived in extended families in the same home or built homes on their parents' property. We sometimes forget the demographic of pre-World War II America where more than 50% of the population lived on subsistence farms. It wasn't until the mid-fifties that there was a great movement from the rural areas to suburbia and this coincided with the movement from urban areas to suburban areas. We don't hear very much about the influx of people from the rural areas to suburbia as we are so intent on speaking about White Flight from the cities.

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So Paul Ryan's comments may have been cute and in reference to a sagging economy but they reflect a worldview that originated in the sixties and still remains at the heart of the counterculture implying a rejection of the home, family values, and parents. We were as a nation in far greater distress during the Depression of the thirties and no one worried about launching their children then or getting rid of Mom and Pop because they were an undeserved burden. In fact, children were of greater value then and were needed to work the farms. Old folks were depositories of wisdom handing down imortant skills and moral tales from the past. That we don't value this aspect of the family as a viable economic unit that ushers us through hard times is reflective of an age that does not value family.

Source: http://8thavesouth.blogspot.com/2012/08/on-paul-ryan-and-launching.html

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